i look good in my clothes. with the right undergarments & good make up & blown dry hair, i hold my own. i will even venture so far as to say that i don’t look awful naked- make up or not. i’ve got a womanly body & heck, let’s just get it out there, i even know how to work it. but there is one thing i can not wear well. i can’t wear bathing suits. i have a super long torso & ribs that stick out no matter what size i am & a large chest that makes fitting into anything that fits my waist impossible. i can wear bikinis but only if my tummy is as tan as my arms and that takes a while. plus while trainer robert is amazing my love for wine has not helped in the six pack arena. i don’t think i’m fat. just not as flat as i would like. & flat is key for bikinis in my book. don’t EVEN suggest a tankini. way too mini van mom. i’d rather not look perfect in a bikini than hide under a blanket of mom fabric. a size 6 ain’t that bad (that is of course until you try on a bathing suit)
last summer i was not so lucky with my choices. you can read more here & here. this year i’ve decided to go for a patterned one piece possibly strapless. i’m a little crazy for this number:
it’s not super inexpensive. but i’m hoping its happy. i can’t decide whether to work the bohemian cowgirl hat beach look or the glam gold on the beach uber big sun hat look. i’m kinda stuck in the middle. i don’t like coverups. unless they are silk. and i don’t like those little tubby dresses everyone is wearing- not me. sigh. what a drama this is. to pick one simple piece. one look for summer. i think i need a stylist
on a side note-
my cute sister-in-law sent me this email yesterday as we are all going to rosemary beach together in 2 weeks. she & i have been bitching about our summer wardrobe choices. her email made my laugh. she’s funny. i have funny sister in laws. thank goodness. cause a good sense of humor and loads of liquor is about the only way to get through family beach week in unflattering bathing suit pour moi. ps my sister in law is thin as a rail (no cottage cheese anywhere) but it rings true that everyone feels fat & ugly when buying new swim suits
” jade, after spending a better part of several hours in Newtown at my very favorite bathing suit shop I decided on this one. Of course, my size…..well…is much larger than the one the girl is wearing. Damn models. I tried to stay away from black, again, but alas…I failed. I tried on at least 10 of the suits they feature on the website. I looked like a dork in the white and black one, and quickly revealed my left boob when I tried to raise my arm. I even attempted the two piece. I was almost kicked out of the store for stretching out a non-stretch material. Can you say “oh, honey….I’m sorry you tried that on!” lol I found many others that I liked on the hanger, but they didn’t like me. Maybe it was the bad lighting? Maybe it was the confined space with a way big mirror? Chad swore that my ass didn’t look like I was hit with a cheese grater. God, please be with me on Rosemary Beach”
